As I have gotten older, there has been one constant in my life; Video Games. That may sound sad, but it’s entirely true. Some of my earliest childhood memories revolve around playing Atari with my parents. We even had a notebook that we kept high scores in, since back then these records were not retained on the cartridges. It always brought us together and we enjoyed the competition of seeing who could best the last person holding the controller.
Years later, I have started a new tradition of playing games with my family. My wife and I used to play Guitar Hero and still on occasion will play games like Scene-It or You Don’t Know Jack. My son has even gotten into the tradition with the recent release of the (surprisingly) smash hit Skylanders. Though he is only 2 and doesn’t really do much more than swapping the figures on the portal. He understands why I ask him to, and knows each of the seventeen characters we have by name. Again, it may seem a bit sad, but it makes me very happy that we can share this time together, as a family.
What I have only now started to come to grips with, is the fact that I will probably not be able to do this anymore with my friends. Everyone has their own families, their own schedules, and trying to get someone to make time to come over and play games for hours just isn’t feasible anymore. Even as recent as a few years ago, I was totally opposed to the idea of never having “couch co-op” again. Not to say that I still wouldn’t want that to happen whenever possible, but I have come to realize, it probably never will again. At least for many more years.
I have to let go. I need to embrace the future, I guess. Looking at it from a completely different angle, it’s a bit selfish to only want to play with people in the same room. I have met a ton of awesome people on the internet that play games as much, if not more, than I do. I could probably get in some games with them. I’ve struggled to really nail down why I have such an issue with going to an almost strictly online based co-op. The best answer that I can come up with, I don’t want to get old. Sounds a bit broad, but it’s exactly what I feel.
As stated, when I was a small child we played games with family. As I grew up, there were many a late-night session of gaming had at my house. However, as time has gone on, those play sessions have gotten harder and harder to accomplish. In my head, I am not only losing a slight grip on a sort of security blanket, but something that intensely connected to my childhood. I am a husband, and a father. My responsibilities now, naturally, are far bigger than they ever were when I was a kid. Trust me when I say, it is NOT an easy thing to come to grips with.
What doesn’t help ease the transition to online gaming, is the simple fact that making new friends, at my age, isn’t easy. I have been playing games online with a group of guys that truly is not so much a “clan” as it is a “brotherhood”. Getting into this group takes work and dedication, and is totally worth it. For guy that never had a brother, these guys have all stepped up and me feel like I now have many. I bring them up because this is the exception, not the rule. The online community is practically bursting at the seams with all the foul-mouthed, racist, homophobic, and just generally disrespectful group of kids this side of a 4chan message board. There is a reason why almost every game has “Online portion of this game not rated by the ESRB” because they would all be rated AO.
When I play online, I tend to play in silence. Not for fear of being housed by some tween, but because the conversations (for the most part) found in your average COD game are not of the highest level of intelligence. This puts me at a complete disadvantage. Games that require constant communication are almost impossible to play with out gathering like-minded people together. Think I’m wrong? Try playing a game of Gears 3 online with a group of randoms and see how well that goes over. This is why it is hard for me to give up the dream of playing everything with friends in the same room.
Having said all that, I am learning that I must let it all go. It’s better to start adjusting now, so that ten years down the road when it is all gone, I will be ready to face the change head on. I will, however, do my part in at least attempting to make sure that my son is more respectful of the people he will play with in years to come. If by teaching him manners and the benefits of communication in real life spreads to his online life, then I have done my job. I refuse to allow him to be “that kid” in a COD lobby that is constantly cursing or singing. I want him to have as much fun online with his friends that I had when we crowded around a 32in television to play Goldeneye for ten hours straight. In doing so, he needs to understand that his fun can’t come at the expense of the people he is playing with or against. After all, griefing your friends is WAY different than griefing random people just trying to have a good time.
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