Review: “Bram Stoker’s Dracula’s Curse”
- Scott
- Oct 27, 2012
- 2 min read
In an unnamed city, in an alternate universe, Vampires have basically taken over the planet and it’s up to the hunters to keep the humans safe. I think I’d rather be dead, permanently.
Rufus and Jacob Van Helsing (stick with me) are both vampire hunters. Though there has long been a pact between the Vampires and the humans, someone has broken that pact and is killing humans again. Rufus and Jacob and their rag tag group search for answers. They discover that an exiled vampire named Bathroly, who was long thought to be dead, has come back and is killing “pure bloods” in order to gain the power of Dracula. There are double crosses, “plot twists” and a lot of green blood. By the end a great secret is revealed and everything is wrapped up nicely in a pretty, blood-soaked bow.
Bram Stoker, or his writings, had absolutely nothing to do with this movie. It involves vampires, and that is about as close as it gets to having even the slightest bit to do with him. Dracula’s Curse is full of nonsense of all shapes and sizes. Vampires in top hats, a guy that I guess was Satan, wooden stake bayonets on a shotgun, and fake teeth. The crew that makes up the vampire hunters team is about as stereotypical as it comes. There’s a country girl and guy, a stuck up girl, the hot bitch, the douche bag, and the suited leader.
The plot and story are pretty thin. Though it could have been fleshed out and acted properly to the point of it being decent, that just never happened. This is mainly due to the fact that the production company behind Dracula’s Curse is The Asylum. The same people behind the wonderful movies like “Transmorphers” and the other misleading titles. I didn’t actually know that it was one of theirs until, well, until it was too late.
While there are truly laugh out loud situations (however unintentional they are) this is not a good movie. It’s way too long, clocking in at about two hours, and it is filled with scenes where nothing much is going on. The run time could have been cut in half if we weren’t made to try and have feelings for some of the characters involved. If you have to have a crappy horror movie on in the back ground and you only have access to Bram Stoker’s Dracula’s Curse, I guess it will do. But really, you could probably make more entertaining movies on your own on Halloween.
Comentários