Classic Tale, New Twist… while I’m not saying that isn’t correct, it also doesn’t mean that it makes the movie some wonderful bit of cinema.
Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters starts as the titular Hansel and Gretel are led out into the woods and left there by their father. With no idea how to get back to their home and no idea where they are, the brother and sister wander around the woods aimlessly. They then stumble upon a home made entirely of candy. Just as the Grimm fairy tale goes, they begin eating the candy and wander their way into the home. Upon entering the home, they find it is inhabited by a witch. The witch then force feeds them candy to fatten them up so that she can eat them. Prior to actually getting to eat the children however, they break free of their bindings and attack the witch forcing her into the fire.
Flash forward an unknown (or unremarkable) amount of time and Hansel and Gretel have grown up. Unlike when they were children and virtually helpless, they have now gone on to be very successful “Witch Hunters”. Traveling around from town to town practicing their trade. In the town they are staying in currently, they break up a town meeting [read lynching] of a woman falsely being accused of being a witch. Finding the actual witch then becomes their top priority. The mystery they unravel is far greater than even they could have imagined.
This movie looks great, I’ll give it that much. Visually the witches look pretty great. The special effects surrounding their movements and fights is smooth and not the least bit campy. Gretel is played by Gemma Arterton and the main witch is played by Famke Jansseon. Both are incredibly lovely actresses and really go a long way to making this movie easy on the eyes as well. I guess what I am getting at here, is that I liked the look of this movie over all.
I guess I shouldn’t nit pick a movie wherein there is a duo hunting witches, but hunting them with rapid fire crossbows and literally a gatling gun is a bit far fetched. I dunno… it was hard to try and envision a world where magic and machine guns both exist and no one questions either. Maybe that’s just me. There was just something about this movie that rubbed me the wrong way. Though it would appear that Rotten Tomatoes agrees with me (as it sits now at 15%) there is no accounting for taste in others. It would appear that there is a sequel in the works now, and apparently (if IMDB is to be believed) Will Ferrel and Adam McKay are producing it. Your guess is as good as mine there. However, as of now Gemma Arterton and Jeremy Renner are NOT attached. Still… it’s probably better than “Hanzel and Gretel Get Baked“.
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