Clowns have never really been scary to me, even the ones associated with ICP. However, this movie, in spite of itself, really creeped me out. And yes, it was because of the clown.
Scary Or Die is an anthology of short horror stories. This is something I didn’t realize going into the movie. It is five stories told back to back with a thin string holding them together. Most of the stories have an almost “Tales From The Crypt” twist ending to them. Some are obvious from the start and others take a while to surface, so to speak.
Of the five stories “The Crossing”, “Lover Come Back”, and “Re-Membered” are the weakest. They are pretty straight forward and if you can’t see the twist coming before it happens, you haven’t seen enough horror movies. It’s not to say they are “bad” just predictable. The other two “Taejung’s Lament” and “Clowned” are much better, with “Clowned” being far and away the best. This is probably the reason that it is the only description given in the story synopsis on NetFlix.
Taejung’s Lament is a sad story about a man that has lost the love of his life. The title character spends his days working in an office, and his nights drinking in a bar. He is obviously gutted over the death of his wife, and is having trouble adjusting to life with out her. One night on his way home from a bar he stumbles into an abduction of a young girl. Taejung intervenes and the story goes from there. It does have a twist to the end, but was easy to figure out. What made it one of the better stories was how it was portrayed almost completely devoid of speaking lines and the slight tweak on the setting. I don’t want to give it away, but it’s clever enough for a fifteen minuet horror short film.
Finally we get to “Clowned”. I had a hard time with this story. I couldn’t tell if it was trying to be funny, or scary, or was deliberately trying to make me feel confused for that reason. Emmett is an X dealer that is also a loving boyfriend, son, and older brother. After his little brothers birthday party is cut short by a child disappearing, he has one job to do; Pay the clown. Things get a little weird and he is forced to throw the clown out of his house and a fight ensues. At one point the clown bites Emmett, and that’s where the story really gets… interesting.
Much like a werewolf, Emmett is now turning into a clown. His clothes don’t fit, his feet are growing larger, and his skin begins to take on a pasty white hue. A couple days of this and Emmett starts to realize that he is becoming a clown. Not just any clown though, one that hungers after human flesh. He runs away from his home in order to keep his family, and more importantly his younger brother safe. As the story progresses, the resolution becomes clear to both the viewer, and Emmett. It eventually reaches that point, and the story ends.
Clowned really gave me the creeps. There were moments of humor, like when Emmett fights the clown and a bike horn is heard when he punches him. And there are moments of legitimate horror like the shadowy figure under the pier and a child crying for help. I was (and still am) conflicted with this movie. Part of me doesn’t like it for straddling the humor/horror line and taking hard swings to both sides, but part of me really enjoys that it does exactly that. I have never had a problem with clowns before, but this movie honestly made me see why people that have Coulrophobia, have a legit reason.
The through-line for all five of these shorts is a bit weak, but made for a fun bit of time trying to put together the pieces. Characters pop up in each story that can be linked back to previous stories told. It’s an interesting way to show that writers are still attempting to keep things fresh. I really just don’t like anthology movies. Scary Or Die has it’s moments and is worth watching. It didn’t blow my mind, but for one reason or another, it’s going to stick around in my head, like it or not.
Comments