Previously posted on blog and written by S. Kess
(Sung poorly to the tune of the “Beverly Hillbillies” theme song) Come and listen to my story about a dirty li’l shed A man went fox hunting and he wound up undead Now he hides from the sun while he sleeps on the floor to live he has to drink a whole lot of gore Blood that is, Hemoglobin, claret. Ok, enough of that. “The Shed” is a 2019 vampire flick about a hunter named Bane played by Frank Whaley, a guy many people have looked at and gone “oh, he kind of reminds me of Jon Cryer.” Mr. Bane gets turned into a bloodsucker and ends up hiding in the shed of Stanley (played by Jay Jay Warren), a 17-year-old delinquent that lives with his grandfather Ellis (Timothy Bottoms.) Stan is prone to dream sequences and there is an early cheesy fantasy that creates a great contrast with the rest of the film and sets the tone. He dreams of a better life and family but wakes to the daily misery that causes him to act out. One morning he wanders outside and heads to the shed and things aren’t right in the dark shadows within the confined space. Someone is in there so he tries to scare them off. He sends the dog in after the noise and, well, some of the dog comes out in a hurry. From here Stan has a choice: have his own hell-born pet or try and end the menace. Despite his troubled history and the fact that everyone around him treats him like shit, he is a pure soul who doesn’t want people harmed and decides to do the right thing. Of course, his reputation means people won’t listen to him and things go to hell in a hurry. Even when he tries to do the right thing, someone comes along and screws the pooch. The misadventure ends up involving multiple people including his friend Dommer (Cody Kostro), Dommer’s bully Marble (Chris Petrovski), and Stan’s former friend and crush Roxy (Sofia Happonen). Stan and Roxy have a sweet, clumsy chemistry that really works while Dommer, Marble, and… basically everyone else kind of suck as people and are unlikable. Luckily, Warren has a very likable charm since Stan is on screen almost constantly and he carries the picture well. He also has some facial expressions that remind one of Jason Lee.
The cinematography is very fun, with some shots that eco Leigh Whannel’s work in “Upgrade” and “The Invisible Man.” It also uses odd angles well to create a vibe of reality distortion and doesn’t overdo it. The entire thing is bright and sunny in an effort to create contrast and because the sun is a deadly weapon. There is a lot of fun gore dripping from the walls and oozing across the floor. You get one hell of a fun finale to cap it off. The film really doesn’t have any huge drawbacks other than some slightly unlikable characters. Everything is at least competent and most aspects are above average or better.
“The Shed” really surprised me. I fully expected this to be a “my pet vampire” situation where Stan uses the vampire to kill his enemies. Instead, he tried to be the hero and to protect people, of course, those intentions went to shit but Stan stayed true to his character the entire way. He was fearless and heroic. Despite his troubled past, his true character shined through. He carried the film with some help from Roxy, their chemistry, the action, gore, and character work lead to a ridiculously fun and engaging vampire flick.
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